170.4

I stepped on the scale this morning and found that number.

It has been difficult to walk the walk to the tune of the talk I kept saying in the beginning of my journey.  “I’ll hit 175 and then eat how I’d like to eat for the rest of my life and see where I end up.”  I injured my back in February and didn’t work out as much.  I grew bored with Curves and didn’t work out much.  I didn’t lose any weight for about four months, possibly three.  I didn’t gain any weight either, which was a relief.

I’ve been wanting to hit two numbers for a while now.  I want to see the 160’s on the scale and I would really love to be a size 12.  At this point I’m thinking I could find a few size 12’s which might fit me and with 170.4 on the scale…. I’m getting excited about seeing the 160’s.

The best part about all this?

I haven’t been trying to lose weight.  I haven’t even been counting calories.  I’ve been eating how I want to eat (ok well, not necessarily EXACTLY how I want to eat) and exercising.  Sure, the first time I eat something I mentally calculate how many calories are in it or check the package to see the calorie content and then my brain puts it in a category.  I don’t know how many calories I’ve been consuming in a day but I do know it’s summer and I move less than during the school year when I’m working.  I also usually eat more during the summer (gah, that boredom eating still gets me).

This may well be the first summer that I’ve lost weight without being actively involved in a diet.  I think I have said this before but it is worth repeating.  I struggled every summer of my life not to gain weight.  When it came time for school I dreaded putting on school clothes again for fear they’d be tighter, and they usually were.  There were a couple years when I packed on nearly 15 lbs in a summer, possibly more.  Always I felt desperate and powerless.  I didn’t know how to stop it and I figured I never would.

170.4 is sorta feeling like a victory cry.

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